Posted by: Ingrid | August 28, 2008

I went into this past weekend with a to do list a mile long. Classes start this week for both me and Clint, and I’ve found, true to form, that I over the span of 3 months I went from wanting to take Greek for the fun of it to enrolling in the Apologetics masters program to deciding to try to finish by May of 2010 to signing up for three classes this semester, which is the maximum amount of units that I can take while working forty hours a week. So suddenly I’m starting classes in a day; Greek 1, Old Testament Survey, and a writing seminar. My first classes since spring of 2003. I’m terrified. I have this horrible fear that I’ve forgotten how to be a student. I know that I can do well in school, but I don’t know that I can do well, help my husband with all that he’s doing, do the cleaning and cooking, work 40 hours a week, go to classes, do my homework, somehow have a social life, and not go insane. Plus I’m afraid that I’ve forgotten how to write a paper. All of this is bringing up more stress than I want to deal with, which then sends me to my default mode of black and white thinking, if I can’t do it all, I don’t want to/don’t have the energy to do any of it, “it” being everything from homework to cleaning the house to running errands to making phone calls to figuring out where my classes are held. I end up feeling like a jar of peanut butter and tequilla shots might be the only solution to the chaos of life.
So this weekend I tackled a lot of things, didn’t finish everything, but at least made a dent in the list. I also managed to start a fun book, play the piano, talk to my family, see my husband at work, go to church, get 9 hours of sleep on Saturday night, do my last long run before the Disneland half marathon next weekend, and help out with Sunday school.

I finished the pesto sauce that I started.

Clint and I started and finished the loads of laundry that had been piling up.

We got new phones (Great, one more thing to figure out…)

I purged my closet and organized.
I read. Or tried to read. And worried about picking out a topic for my paper when I know nothing about the beliefs of various cults and frankly don’t care that much.

I cleaned.

I even made myself a good dinner on Saturday night. Yes, that is a serving bowl and yes that’s an entire avocado on top and yes, this salad was amazing!

I got a haircut.

I spent way too much at Walmart because I don’t know when I’ll have time to go shopping again.

I bought two shirts and discovered that the style this fall is to make everyone look like they’re pregnant even if they aren’t. But I loved the color so much that I had to get it, but then the following morning at church I past an acquaintance who’s 7 or 8 months pregnant and after we made eye contact and smiled she totally checked out my stomach. No, I’m not pregnant, just a victim of fashion. I also discovered while shopping that I need to shop with someone who knows something about jeans. Because I don’t, and I know what I want but don’t know how to find what I want. The last time I actually bought a new pair of jeans I was 14. The jeans were green and I bought them at Walmart. And that was 14 years ago.
I’m comforted, in the midst of all this craziness, by the thought that not only did Clint win a BBQ at work a few weeks ago, he also managed to win (an ironic prize for a Talbot student on contract) quite a nice supply of rum.

So if anyone has to ask “Where has the rum gone?”

You’ll know it’s been a rough week.


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