Posted by: Ingrid | September 11, 2009

One Month: Dear Isaac (and random photos of adorable cuteness)

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Dear  Isaac,

Otherwise known as Mr. Grumpy Face, Sweetie Pie, Love, Stinky Pants, Sleepless Wonder, El Chunko, and a whole host of other names that will make you want to disown me if I mention them when you’re around thirteen years old.  Speaking of adolescence, I promise you that I had no idea there was such a thing as baby acne but I’m really not laughing at you (too hard).  Babies (and not just teenage boys) get massive pimple outbreaks… who knew?  I’m also trying not to laugh at your head size, which has grown  exponentially since birth (and thank God it was after birth).  Every time I look down on your enormous noggin I think of all those lines from So I Married an Axe Murderer.  “It’s got its own weather system!”  Right.  Not laughing.

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I cannot believe that a month ago (only a month?!?) our lives change forever and I went through a thing called labor for 46 hours to bring you into the world.  I will only hold that experience against you for most of your life.  I think my favorite response to the length of my labor with you came from one of your Daddy’s friends who emailed that, should you ever do anything bad to me he would come out and give you a talking to that started and ended with “Your mother was in labor with you for 46 hours and you did WHAT to her.”  I may take him up on that someday.

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But enough about your upcoming teen years.  We’re having enough fun right now.

You were so good when you showed up on August 10th.  You slept a lot, only cried when you were hungry, and spent long periods of time looking intelligently at us and your surroundings.  We wondered how we managed to get so lucky.  And then you woke up at about 2 weeks.  Now you are not quite so easy and sometimes I just don’t understand what you’re trying to say.  Some nights you sleep great and other nights I think I’m going to die.  Life has gotten unpredictable with you but it’s hard to tell if it’s you or the fact that we dragged you all over kingdom come the first 18 days of your life.  We figured out that in that period you’d “lived” in 6 different places.  So much for stability.  Seriously, I hear that it’s over-rated anyway.  You can tell that to your therapist when you grow up.

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Now that we’ve finally started settling in to our new place you still aren’t in your nursery.  In fact, I’m thinking that I’ll have that organized about the same time baby number 2 shows up.  There is a reason why you nest before the baby comes.  If possible, you should also try to do all your grocery shopping for the next 18 years before the baby as well.  I made my first trip to the store with you, solo, a few days ago and we both came home in tears.

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When it comes to sleeping (and EVERYONE wants to know how you sleep), you are all over the place.  Not literally, of course, since we swaddle you.  And we know just how much you like that, don’t we?  We also know how strong your arms have gotten and it is not uncommon now for me to find you in the middle of the night all swaddled except for one arm that you’ve worked free and are now holding straight up as a sign of victory.  We have to swaddle you or you wake yourself up… Whoa!  There goes another flying arm in front of my face!  Random appendages!  How cool! When we unswaddle you, you look for all the world like a baby Socrates or Yoda and it’s hard not to laugh.

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You really can be a sleepless wonder and can spend hours staring at the ceiling when you ought to be falling asleep.  At other times, generally the ones we want you awake, you are impossible to rouse.  Waking a sleeping baby is not as easy as it sounds.  Sometimes all I have to do is breathe.  Other times, I’ve successfully played the piano while you’ve stayed asleep in your Baby Bjorn.  Someday we’ll have you on a consistent napping/sleeping schedule.  I hope.  Because seriously, I like us both better when we sleep.

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With the limited amount of hands free/baby sleeping time, I’m finding that I now do things very fast in small chunks of time.  I don’t really like this system and have had a few days now where I want nothing more than to go back to California, to my desk, and to be pregnant forever because having a newborn is hard.  I went from having a structured 8 hours at a desk that I didn’t love, but at least I could plan the time before and after.  Now I have all this time and can’t plan it out and don’t get long stretches of time to do anything.  I miss that.  I also miss sleeping.  Have I mentioned that?

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The other thing that I get asked about all the time is how you’re doing breastfeeding.  I can’t believe that you are the skinny little baby we brought home from the hospital.  You are growing out of your onesies, happily working on a triple chin, and are now around 11.5 pounds.  There is something satisfying knowing that I was able to provided everything you needed to grow as much as you have and I’ve found breastfeeding to be not as hard or as sore as I expected.  I love all the loud snuffly noises that you make when you eat, as if there is nothing better in the whole wide world.  All I can think of when I hear that is Child, if you think this is great, wait until I introduce you to steak and peanut butter ice cream. You know what you want and you also know when you’re finished, which you express by pursing your lips, stretching your arms, and showing absolutely no interest in opening your mouth.  You eat the way you sleep, to one extreme or the other.  Either you cry as though you must be starving to death and then latch on, hands on either side and suck vigorously while giving me such a ticked off look that I want to laugh, or you (always when I want to run, of course) simply show no interest even if it’s time to be hungry.  You give me this comical but frustrating lackadaisical look as I’m trying desperately to get you to eat something, anything, as if to say, Woman, why are you trying to shove your boob in my mouth?  I really have no idea what I’m supposed to do with this.  I think it really serves more of an ornamental purpose, don’t you?

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Seriously Dude, good work on the belly.  You’ve done yourself proud.

When you do eat though, nine times out of ten you end up passed out on my lap in all your chubby glory.  And there is nothing as beautiful as a milk drunk baby.  Nothing in the world.  They smell great too.

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We cannot believe how much you’ve grown and changed, little guy.  When I put you on my chest now, you lift your head up and don’t bobble around quite so much.  You push off with your legs and grab my fingers and sometimes my hair.  You no longer curl up with your hands in front, looking for all the world like a velociraptor.  Instead, you stretch all the way out now and we can’t believe how long you’ve gotten.  You still are alert and attentive and look people in the eye.  You look contemplative, like you’re taking in the world as things happen in front of you and may want to journal about it later.  You seem to like people watching and I can’t help thinking that as a joint project between your father and I, you’re going to be one of those people who goes to Disneyland to people watch and then make fun of everyone.  You have also learned how to suck your fists and I have to admit, it cracks me up because you don’t really know how to navigate the hands, they just sort of end up in your mouth and you’re like, Hey look!  It’s a fist and I’m sucking on it.  Cool. This new skill is only problematic when you’re hungry and go in for the kill only to find your fist in your mouth instead.  Then you screw up your face, and suddenly are irate because MOM!  MY FIST WON’T PRODUCE MILK.  WAHHHH!!!  Just like that.  And then I have to remind you that life isn’t easy, even when you’re only a month old.

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You still have no hair and no eyebrows, but I haven’t lost hope that they’ll grow in someday.

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After one month, Isaac, I’m still so glad that you’re here.  I love snuggling you against me, I love your soft skin and all the noises that you make.  I love watching the expressions flit across your face.  And I promise I’ll try to remember to start covering you up during diaper changes so you stop peeing in your face and down the wall.

Love,

Mom

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(and Dad)

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Responses

  1. well worth the wait. Beautiful.

  2. Yay! You’re alive! Sounds like a good first month. 🙂

  3. We miss you all! Thanks for sharing your first month with us! Keep the updates coming 🙂

  4. Well that is positively adorable. It’s good to know you guys are doing well. I love the things you wrote about him, like the nursing noises. I miss that! He is such a cutie and you guys look good as parents.


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