1. Ability to sleep for 9 hours at a time without having to feed, burp, rock, and diaper a baby.
2. Super savings on diapers.
3. You never have to worry about losing the baby weight if the baby hasn’t appeared.
4. All bad performances at races can be explained away with the excuse “but I’m pregnant”.
5. Because a basketball shaped baby bump is infinitely preferable to the scary postpartum stomach that small children like to poke with their fingers.
6. Less laundry involved with no baby clothes and since I am down to only a few outfits that look okay and feel like they cover my stomach.
7. Carte blanche to eat as much ice cream as I want (if only it sounded good).
8. Ability to use “Expectant Mother” parking spots – the next best thing to owning a handicap parking pass.
9. Angry late pregnancy hormones trump weepy emotional postpartum hormones any day. And they’re more productive.
10. You never have to spend another dollar on pregnancy tests or stay up nights wondering.
Forever, folks. This baby is not going anywhere soon! (Maybe I should try walking?)