Posted by: Ingrid | January 28, 2014

Three Months: Please pass the sleep

3 months

Dear Liliana,

So you are a quarter of a year old today.  I am not feeling very creative when it comes to writing you a letter and I have been even less diligent than usual when it comes to documenting your growth in photos.  Ironic that your very existence is what is keeping me from giving visual proof of your existence.  You are sort of an exhausting baby.  Or maybe the spacing of our three children is exhausting.  Either way, I am hard pressed to find a day I am not exhausted, grumpy, in tears, or trying to medicate a headache.

You are cute though.  I will grant you that.


And it is a terrible, horrible, snowy, windy, COLD winter.  Spring cannot come fast enough.  Things are getting just a little crazy indoors!


You are a hardy infant, which is what I like to see, particularly in the cold months.  You obviously know how to eat and you do it well, weighing in at 13.8 pounds.  Yes, you have almost doubled your starting weight.  And I have gained weight this last month, so I am not quite sure what all this magic milk making is doing for me.  I am seriously not impressed.  If I am going to be awakened at all hours and never allowed to sleep longer than (usually) 3 hours at a stretch I want all this weight gone and to fit into my jeans.  You owe me that at least.

You are adorably chubby.  You still have the multiple chins and now you have the cute dimply baby thighs as well.  The chins lend themselves well to the imperious “dowager aunt” look that you sometimes give.  Like you’re looking down on a world that just doesn’t quite meet your standards.  You also do an awesome lip quiver when things don’t go your way and you are very sensitive to noises, lights, and your Daddy’s whiskers.


Everyone comments on the fact that you look like your father.  He still apologizes for that.

You giggled for the first time on January 8th while I was bouncing you up and down.  If I recall, it was after a night of terrible sleep and it was the only thing that kept me from disowning you.  It is so sweet when you giggle and even better now that you are trying to “converse” with us, making all these noises with the most sincere expression on your face.  When you do that I just want to stare at you and talk to you forever.  When you “talk” you also do that “baby marching in place thing”, as if your mouth and legs are connected.


I forget you all the time.  It is not uncommon for me to round the corner and find you, half dressed, next to a clean diaper.  And then I will remember that I left the room to get the wipes, forgot why I left, unloaded the dishwasher, and then found you.


This trend may be due to lack of sleep.  It is a little terrifying to me that, while I would probably be gauged unable to drive after one alcoholic drink, it is perfectly acceptable for me to be driving all manner of small children around after not getting enough sleep for three months.  If you see a white minivan on the road, give it wide berth.


I have already put away all of the newborn clothes and some of the 0-3’s and you have moved up to size 2 diapers.  Folding away those impossibly tiny clothes made me realize how fast this all is going.  You are already past the point where you nap for hours against my chest, which is sad to me.  You have discovered your tongue and your hands (and how they go together) and are stretching all over the place.  You already have impressive neck and head control, despite your hatred of tummy time and soon you will be rolling, sitting, talking, walking.


You are getting so big and I feel like I am missing so much.

You are drooling in ridiculous amounts.  We are guessing you may be in the early stages of teething, but you never know until teeth pop through.  Teething is a very retrospective thing.


You still are a very spitty baby.  Before we go out I almost always just wrap you in a blanket and me in a robe until you are fed and have spit up at least twice.  Otherwise the laundry is impossible to get through because I have to put both our clothes in wash.  You get such a happy expression on your face and then geysers of milk come flowing up from your mouth and you have no clue what is going on.  It would be funny if it weren’t such a mess.  You are more likely than anyone to get a sock (clean or dirty) or a dish towel (again, clean or dirty) put in your face to wipe you up.  We have more darling burp cloths than ever we had before, they just don’t tend to be where we need them, which is wherever I am about two seconds after you have finished eating.  You used to want to be patted when your tummy hurt.  Now you want to be jiggled or, even better, laid on my lap while I push your knees into your chest.


And don’t even get me started on the blow outs, which happen frequently.  I am now a pro at getting baby poop out of almost everything.  I just wish it didn’t get all over your cutest clothing.  Or in your sparkly shoes.  Or on anything of mine, for that matter.  Maybe someday, when I want to tackle even more laundry, I will switch you to cloth diapers.  HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!  That was a good joke.

I am trying to get you more on a schedule, after a few nights ago when you were up every 1.5 hours.  It was awful.  So now I am waking you up from naps to make sure you don’t sleep too long and wearing ear plugs at night so that I don’t “rescue” you too soon.  You are a baby burrito in your double swaddle and you sleep well in it (unless I am trying to sleep too, apparently).  You are no longer much of a pacifier fan, just like the boys.


We all vie for your smiles, which you lavish on everyone now as long as they are willing to engage with you for more than 5 seconds.  You are displaying a mild interest in tickling but bouncing is the best.  You have also begun holding onto whoever is holding you, which is so sweet, your little hands clutching onto my shirt or my skin.


It is so short, this period where you will want to cling to me and be held, where you gaze at me with your penetrating blue eyes while you nurse.  I am trying to fight back the tired fog and appreciate the fleeting-ness of it all and not wish the time away.





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